Once a Thief, Always a Thief

So, I’ve been accused of stealing my own things. That’s my current predicament. Now, I know, anyone who’s followed me or knows me in real life knows I’ve had my real troubles in the past. I have actually stolen other people’s things. That’s a fact, as I’ve recorded many times before, that I’m not proud of.

But I turned my life around years ago. I’ve tried to be a positive presence online, showing how a person can grow and change, but I’m now having my doubts, both about myself and about the system.

What happened can be laid out pretty easily. A supposed friend of a friend, whom I was friendly with (is that clear? let’s just call him an acquaintance) stayed the night at my place last week. He’s been to prison, like me, and I make a point of not judging people on the surface for doing things like that. He seemed nice enough, and so I let him crash for a night.

Well, that turned out to be a mistake. I woke up, had breakfast with him, had a chummy conversation, showed him out and went about my day. It was only that evening that I noticed my PS4 was missing.

I keep it in a drawer, so it wasn’t obvious at first. I immediately called my friend, got his friend’s number, and called him. The guy denied the whole thing. He said he’d never do it, he was reformed like me, yadda yadda. He acted offended that I of all people would accuse him. He suggested someone else had stolen it. He even threw his own friend under the bus.

I tried to stay calm, I said I wasn’t going to call the cops or anything, just return the PS4. Nothing doing. He hung up after giving some lame excuse and said he’d call back later.

He never did.

Now, I knew where he lived, this guy. He had told me about it because the whole reason he needed a place to crash was the building was shut down over some pest infestation.

I know at this point I should have involved the cops or tried to press my friend to do more, or just let it go. Instead, I broke into his place, and I took my PS4 back.

Well, now I’m getting calls from this guy, who says he’s going to call the cops and get me arrested for stealing my own property back. I may need to contact a theft and burglary attorney and see where I stand with the law. It’s a whole mess.

Worse than the mess, though, are the implications of what happened. Did I never actually change? Does no one? Is the system so screwed up that I can’t help but be drawn to the wrong side?

It’s all so awful and confusing. And for the first time in a long time, I feel like I don’t have any answers.